An actual phone exchange from yesterday between myself and my sister:
Me: Who’s this?
Heather: Your sister.
Me: Oh! Hey! What’s up?
Heather: Not much. I wanted to know if you’ve given any thought to what you want to get Dad for Christmas.
Me: No, hadn’t thought about it. It’s a little early though, isn’t it?
Heather: Yeah, but I wanted to know if you wanted to split a new iPod for him. His last one got stolen and I thought it would be a nice present to replace it.
Me: His iPod got stolen?
Heather: Yeah. He had a Nano, so I figured it was cost us $100 each to replace it.
Me: I don’t know. Nano’s are kind of lame. I’d rather we just got him one of the regular-sized ones if we’re gonna do… Tell you what: you didn’t buy it yet, right?
Heather: No I didn’t buy it.
Me: Alright, let me do some research and see what I can find. See if I can find a good deal on one.
Heather: Okay. So… your mother broke her arm.
Me: Whose mother?
Heather: Your mother.
Me: You mean our mother? Mom?
Me: Mom broke her arm. That’s what you’re telling me?
Heather: Today. Just a little while ago.
Me: Why did you lead with the iPod?
Me: Why didn’t you just tell me mom broke her arm? Why did we just have a conversation about dad’s Christmas present?
Heather: I don’t know.
Me: Don’t you think telling me how mom’s doing is more important?
Heather: I don’t know, I… I just didn’t want you to think the only reason I called was when something bad happens.
It’s worth noting that this is the first time my sister called me in at least 10 months. My memory doesn’t extend back far enough to remember what the circumstances for that particular call were but she’s not exactly making a compelling case for herself.
At this point I asked to speak with my infirmed mother who’s practically a quadriplegic at this point and won’t have use of her arm (which for those keeping tracking was formerly her “good” arm) for six weeks. Happy holidays!
But hey, at least I know what to get my dad for Christmas. This is my family.